For a dating relationship
By putting Christ before your relationship, you’ll have the wisdom to know whether or not you mean “I love you” in the biblical – not just emotional – sense. The apostle Paul gives us a great outline in the famous “love passage”, 1 Corinthians 13:4-8: SEE ALSO: Don't Settle: He's Not Your Last Optiondoing something: It is actively patient and actively NOT impatient. I won’t dishonor you, and I’ll put you before myself. With the weight of “I love you” in mind, how could Josh and I say it so quickly?Even though we had both committed not to say “I love you” until we meant it the 1 Corinthians 13 way (a fact written into our wedding vows), we said we loved one another much quicker than the average couple.When God’s standards come first, you’ll approach relationships objectively. I hope you realize what a huge proclamation it really is.Your emotions will stay play a role, but they won’t dictate your decisions. When we say “I love you”, we’re really saying something more like this: “I will be patient with you. I won’t be jealous or condescending or arrogant toward you. I promise to uphold purity of mind, body, and spirit, and saturate myself with God’s truth, because I love you. And I hope you see how absolutely it is for you to be in a thriving relationship with Jesus Christ in order to love this way.So I let our connection slip away, allowing my concern over our age difference to overshadow our passion.It was ultimately the right call, I felt, and experts seem to agree.Think of 10 years as a general guideline, but be open to other ages, as well—and don’t limit yourself to dating only someone older.“' Cast a wide net' is what I tell all my clients,” Sussman says.
D., a psychologist and author of “While there are always exceptions to rules, a good rule to remember is that dating someone more than 10 years older will present challenges now or later that add to the preexisting challenges any relationship has,” he says.We are called to love as Christ loved us regardless of relationship status.SEE ALSO: When You're Searching for Love (Read More: How Do I Know If He’s “the One”?Both experts agree than more than 10 years’ difference in a relationship can come with foreseeable issues, but that doesn’t mean it’s a definite nonstarter.Instead, be realistic about what you want in someone, not what you want from their age.